Speaking Your Truth – To Gain Results by D.B. Latimore
“There’s only one thing harder than speaking your truth and that’s not speaking it.” —Naomi Wolf
How often have you heard the following comments: “I’m just direct”, “I speak what’s on my mind” or “I tell it like it is…” The comments are generally made after the “speaking your truth” has yielded a negative result or an unintentional consequence. If you can relate to having said or experienced any of the above, this article is for you.
The ability to speak your truth to gain results is a skill that many fail to master. Most often the truth message is preceded by an ambush of ineffective non-verbal messages such as lack of eye-contact or conversely a hard stare; inappropriate gestures to include the head nods, or the spontaneous sputter (making loud sounds such as exhaling or speaking rapidly in a confused manner); and finally the shifting in posture to get into the “let me tell you what I think stance”. Each is counterproductive to speaking your truth; however it provides the protective barrier from rejection or feeling that we are not being heard.
The purpose of communication is to convey messages to one another. Through Authentic Communication we incorporate our true being consisting of our values and beliefs into our conversation. In Authentic Communication we speak from a place of confidence, competence, and connectivity to deliver a compelling message. This is our place of power. Authentic Communication may be direct, assertive or animated, however the content of the message incorporates the elements of being respectful; factual based on our own understanding; receptive to dialog; reflective and collaborative.
Speaking your truth is important; four tips to assist in achieving positive results:
- Think before you speak – know the message you want delivered
- Breathe – incorporate pauses to allow the listener to receive the message
- Pre-establish your power pose – this is the posture where you are most confident
- Respond not React – incorporate passion (speaking from the heart) vs emotions(defensive and attacking)
It takes courage to communicate authentically, however in the end the positive results are endless.